The Law of Attraction is the law of self-improvement

Self-improvement is a journey we take when we realize we’re not perfect. Understanding the Law of Attraction makes that journey a lot easier.

The art and the science of self-improvement

When we talk about self improvement, we make a couple of assumptions. One, we make the assumption that every human being that ever walked on the surface of this earth is:

  • Born with flaws, and into a flawed environment.
  • Every human being desires a long, happy life.

We call it self improvement because despite being born with flaws and into a flawed environment, a time comes when every human being must take matters into their own hands.

A time comes when blaming others for our circumstances and misfortunes doesn’t cut it anymore. The time when we must make lemonade out of the lemon that the universe hands to us. A time when our own choices lead to self-improvement, self-stagnation, or self-destruction.

Self-improvement is an art because there are so many moving parts, and where the chips fall depends on each person’s circumstances and ingenuity at any given time.

It is also a science because it’s driven by the laws of human nature. The laws of human nature dictate that all things being equal, human behavior is predictable.

Note: Why we talk about kids

You’ll note we talk about kids quite a bit, but not just for the sake of it. In essence, we’re talking about the YOU of tomorrow.

To a great extent, a good adult depends on a good childhood foundation – just like a great building depends on a great foundation.

The better the child development, the easier the work of self-development for the adult later in life.

The Law of Attraction, Defined and Applied

When I started writing about human life, never did it occur to me that I’d need to teach physics to explain self-development. Yet here we are! So, what exactly is the Law of Attraction?  

Simply, the Law of Attraction is the law of life. It’s based on the fact that with very few exceptions, nothing in this universe is random or accidental. 

Bob Proctor, one of the deepest self improvement and motivational speakers of our times explains this using two premises:

  • Your body is a molecular structure

The molecules of your body vibrate so fast, they appear to be still. The vibration determines the frequency you’re on. In turn, your frequency dictates what you attract in your life. 

  • Your paradigm dictates your frequency

Your frequency or the pace of your vibration depends on the paradigm you’re in. 

So, what’s a paradigm? 

The paradigm is a mental program that has almost exclusive control of your behavior. It is the cumulative total of everything poured into your mind since the day you were born. It is the subconscious part of your mind that goes against logic in your consciousness. Almost all human behavior is habitual, and the paradigm is responsible for that.

The Law of Attraction is About Paradigms.

How the Paradigm Works

Example:

Let’s say you’re in the habit of setting New year’s resolutions. Let’s say this year’s resolution is to lose weight by exercising — say 30 pounds by the end of January. You get the best workout gear money can buy and hit the gym or the jogging trail. 

Then come the end of January, you step on the scale and learn you’ve only managed to lose 5 pounds. 

Here, you can do two things. You can change your expectations and maybe work harder. OR you can decide it’s not worth the time and effort, and snap back to your comfort zone. 

Why We Love Comfort Zone

In line with the law of attraction, we choose thoughts that are in harmony with our paradigm. Comfort zone is where people are in a vibration that’s giving them results they don’t want but they’re comfortable. This is where thoughts are in harmony with their paradigm. For you to change your comfort zone, a paradigm shift must occur. 

That we were born into challenges, but also with opportunities to improve and become the best versions of ourselves…

If this feels like you, click here and get the timeless 5 Truths about self-discovery and growth.

What Does It Take to Achieve Longevity of Life?

All humans are not created equal. Everyone is unique in that we are either born with different genetics or into different environments that nurture our growth differently. These differences are amplified by the way we apply the law of attraction in each of our individual lives.

It’s also fair to say that everyone was born into some opportunities to enhance growth and self-improvement, and also some challenges that need to be overcome in the process of that growth.

The law of attraction has everything to do with how we overcome these challenges on our way to self-actualization.

No one can have it all!

As long we’re talking about self-improvement, it’s important to say that no one should hold genetics against anyone else. Neither should the environment you were born into be held against you. However, what should be held against you is how you use the opportunities to overcome the challenges and become the best person you can be.

That’s what makes the difference between SUCCESS and FAILURE.

Health and Fitness

The primary reason we seek health and fitness is survival. It is the ability to fend for ourselves and sustain life for our species as long as possible. Darwinian theory of survival of the fittest means that the healthier and the fitter you are, the better your chances of survival. 

There are three major things that we use to keep ourselves alive:

When you’re sick, you go to the doctor

All things being equal, you’ll find when two individuals suffer the same illness, they react might react differently. One may seek medical help while the other may choose to ignore it for some reason. I’ll let you decide for yourself who between the two people has a better chance of living longer. 

Note that going to the doctor is the last resort. According to a report from the World Health Organization, 63% of deaths are caused by lifestyle diseases. 

Eat a balanced diet

Do you eat to satisfy hunger and cravings, or you eat to nourish your body with the right nutrients in the right proportions? Why/not? 

When you go to the restaurant, do you eat dessert after your meal just because the waiter suggested it to you, even though you know you don’t need it? And when the waiter asks you what drink you want, do you choose soda instead of the ‘boring and the tasteless’ albeit healthier water? 

These are the individual decisions that determine success or failure and whether you’ll have a long or a short life. 

Here is the thing. When you choose to have that soda or dessert or both, you’re very much aware they may be bad for your health in the long run. But you choose them anyway because your paradigm which dictates habits is in control. When habits kick in, all logic goes out the window.

Exercise regularly 

Would you rather spend 30 minutes arguing on social media or hanging out with a friend over a beer, or would you rather use the time to exercise?

Would you rather buy the home workout equipment, or buy a more comfortable brand new couch, so your butt doesn’t while you watch TV?

Here we go again – choices!

What is Happiness, and How Do You Achieve It? 

By definition, happiness is the sense of well being, joy or contentment. It’s brought about by achieving something you’re longing for.  But that’s not all. 

An important thing to keep in mind is that happiness is only relative. Additionally, there is no such thing as absolute happiness as long as there is room for more improvement and growth in your life. 

For example, let me explain the relativity of happiness based on the Hierarchy of Human Needs by the famous psychologist Abraham Maslow. 

Caution: This diagram is for explanation purposes only, and not the actual graphic of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.

As you can see here it is a five-tier ladder for human life. Your happiness depends on your socioeconomic status and your goal. If you’re at the bottom of the pyramid you could be happy by just being able to get some food. Your priorities should reflect your needs. 

That’s not to say you shouldn’t have dreams for self-actualization. It just means that there are so many smaller, but important goals you must reach before your ultimate goal can be achieved.  

On the other hand, if you’re at the top, you may be saddened by the fact that the yacht you ordered three days ago was not delivered on time. You’re always concerned by the next thing because as the say goes, ‘the sky is the limit’. 

This validates the premise that there is no such thing as absolute happiness. Once you get over the threshold of sustaining life, you choose your own happiness.

Note: Something about culture and geography.

In addition to socioeconomics, you can look at happiness through the lenses of geography and culture. As the law of attraction would have it, you can only attract things you can envision. 

You may be the happiest person in Mongolia, but the saddest if you visited the United States of America, and vice versa. That’s because Mongolians are happy about the things they value, but those things are not necessarily the same things that Americans value. 

How the Law of Attraction Affects the Hierarchy of Needs

As we saw above, the Law of Attraction means that you attract things — thoughts, practices, habits, success, etc — that are in harmony with your paradigm.

Through choice or by default, the paradigm determines your level on the hierarchy of needs.

Why We Make Mistakes

As stated in the opening quote, you need three things to reach a goal. 

  1. Know where you are.
  2. Know your goal.
  3. Start moving in that direction of your goal.

You don’t even need to know if you’ll succeed you start moving. Most people know their goals, and they move in that direction. But the problem is at the beginning – most people don’t know where they are.

If you don’t know where you are, you make the mistake of setting the wrong or unrealistic goals.

Let us use the Hierarchy of Needs to illustrate. If you’re worried about food or physical security, it would unrealistic to try self-actualization at that point in time. When you try to solve the wrong problems at the wrong time, you are likely to be met by failure.

Think of it this way…

Studies show that of all people who join fitness programs, weight loss or diet plans, only 5% go all the way to the end. The numbers are not much better for those who start businesses or make new year resolutions just because they’re ‘supposed’ to do it.

So, you ask yourself, what happens with the 95%? Are they not serious? Are they failures? Should they just quit and forget it? No.

Winners never quit, and quitters never win!

Winners are persistent. Instead of quitting, they go back to the drawing board. But they look at things from a different angle. They adjust their expectations. They look for help whichever way they can find it instead of circling in the jungle and repeating the same mistakes over and over again.

The explanation for this is the lack of clarity as to where they are vis a vis what they’re trying to achieve.

You’ll hear people say things like “Oh, I never thought this program was going to take so much time… I don’t get to watch TV anymore… OR …I don’t get to hang out with my friends anymore… I didn’t think it was going to take so much time and commitment to get in shape…”

In other words, they snap back to their comfort zones.

Which brings us back to the Law of Attraction – the good old law of the universe. The only way you can attract something outside your frequency or comfort zone is by reprogramming your mind, a.k.a the Paradigm Shift. 

Quotes: 

The illiterate of the 21st century are not going to be the people who can’t read and write…they’re going to be the people who can’t learn, unlearn and re-learn — Alvin Toffler

 

On goal-setting, you only need three things: know where you are, know where you want to go, and start moving in that direction — Bob Proctor 


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